Good relationships are based on good communication. In order to make your family life blossom, you need to be able to discuss with your spouse even when the situation might be painful or uncomfortable. As soon as your ability to communicate starts worsening, the whole relationship will start facing an increasing amount of problems. Talking is quite simply one of the most powerful tools we have to stay connected with the people around us.
However, it’s not just about being able to talk about your feelings. The ability to talk about emotions is important but you can improve communication in many different ways as well. It’s not always necessary to be discussing how you are feeling or focusing on talking through the more painful aspects of your relationship – sometimes communicating in very basic ways can be the key to happiness.
So, if you are struggling to communicate with your partner, it might be helpful to try these tricks instead of just focusing on talking about the emotions. These will help improve your ability to communicate and it’ll strengthen how close you feel to each other.
Talk about the non-consequential things
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Do you find yourselves talking about the kids all the time? Are all conversations about ‘meaningful’ things, like how your relationship is doing? It can be stressful to always talk about things that matter and are of a high importance. Therefore, you should try to communicate more by talking about the non-consequential things. Essentially, you must do more small talk. Start having a conversation in the morning about the weather or the TV-show you saw last night. Make it light and casual. It’ll help you communicate, have fun and it will ensure you’re not constantly just focusing on emotions, difficult topics and so on.
Have a one-sided conversation
We humans tend to have an urge to respond when someone talks to us. Indeed, sometimes we even demand other people say something to us when we’ve just shared them our emotions. However, you can improve communication in a surprising way by stopping this behavior. Essentially, you should have one-sided conversations every now and then where the other person doesn’t get to respond on the go. Instead, they will listen while the other person talks – perhaps making notes about it in their heads. You’ll then separate and the other person can respond the next day if you feel like it. Now, the purpose of this is not to allow the other person to just vent. It’s much better if they first share their thoughts and then try imagining what the other person is going through.
Share insignificant events with your partner
During the day, it can be a good idea to message your partner. But instead of the messaging reminding them to pick the kids from school or to take the trash out, focus on something more light-hearted. Just like with small talk, start sharing the insignificant events of your day with your partner. Did you have a tasty salad at work? Just text your partner about it. Going for a bike ride? Mention it to your partner. Don’t just mention the stressful and impactful events but increase how often you talk about insignificant events.
Find someone else to talk to
It’s important that you don’t become reliant just on your spouse. Sure, you might only feel relaxed in sharing the most intimate thoughts with your partner but communication is more than just sharing intimate feelings. The thing to understand here is that we don’t always feel like talking but our spouse might. If you are the one who likes to talk and your spouse is not up for it, it’s still important for you to get the frustration or even the happiness out of your system. You need someone else who you can call and talk to – be it a family member or a friend.
Start doing insignificant experiences
Now, many couples believe that their relationship requires a lot of grandiose events. There is this misconception that if you have troubles in the relationship, you just need to book an expensive holiday or organize a fancy date night. But you can actually improve the relationship and your communication if you do insignificant experiences together. These are things like shopping for groceries together, doing the dishes together or reading the paper or the Bible together. The ability to do these things together will be far more important to your relationship’s health than talking about feelings or having date nights. Another great tip is to pick audiobooks and start listening to those together. It’s a great way to learn more about each other and to share your worldview without necessarily making the discussion about you. You can capitalize on discounts available on Frugaa.com which has several offers and best deals on Audible and other bookstores.
Life is a continuous journey and a lesson. There are many things to learn and new hobbies can actually enrich our lives in surprising ways. Indeed, the experience of learning is a great teacher in terms of communication. If you want to deepen your relationship and make communication better between you are your spouse, you should stat to learn new things together. It could be a yoga class, an art class, or you could start photography lessons or cooking lessons. The key is that you are learning and spending time together. The Knowledge Lover is a great place for finding something fun to learn.
The above communication methods don’t focus on talking about feelings. They focus on ensuring you know how to talk about the non-essential things and how to listen and talk without it being too serious. With these, you can instantly boost your relationship and communicate better with your partner when the serious stuff does come up.